The Crew
Every crew has them. The king, the grinder, the project, and the guy who's just here for the vibes. Which one are you?
Every crew has them. The king, the grinder, the project, and the guy who's just here for the vibes. Which one are you?
a.k.a. TheDikTrill, The Fairway King
"Built different. But still beatable."
Okay, so you're the dikkest trill in the team — and you know it. Your swing's smooth, your stats are solid, and your mates hate how easy you make it look.
But careful, champ. Just because your golf is the best doesn't mean victory is guaranteed. You'll cruise through 2-vs-2s, but BetterBall Matchplay can still humble even the best.
Need extra points? Go for the 2-vs-1 or 3-vs-1 challenges — pick off the lower ranks for bonus points. Risky? Sure. But why play safe when you're built different?
And don't get too comfy… the Woodenspoons will cling to you like lost puppies, hoping to ride your coattails to easy second-place points while you grind for your 10. Stay sharp, King. 👑
a.k.a. The Work-in-Progress
"Cling tight, stay humble, and wait for the WhackFuck miracle."
You're the project — the guy who swears the next round will be the one, and somehow believes a new grip, stance, or driver will fix everything.
Your path to victory? Strategy, survival, and a bit of social engineering. Your best move is to make best friends with the Top of the Crop — cling on for dear life and stack those 8-point second places while they battle for 10s. Play smart, not heroic.
Then comes your real shot: The WhackFuckCup. Because of your generous WFC Handicap, this major is basically rigged in your favor. This is your moment — focus, keep it together, and just play a little better than usual. Crack the Top 3, and suddenly you're in the championship conversation.
And if all else fails? Think outside the tee box. Bring a "guest" who just so happens to be a scratch golfer (no need to tell the rest of the crew). Easy 8 points, baby.
a.k.a. The Grinder, The Steady Eddy
"Consistent, calm, and quietly dangerous."
You're not the best, but you're definitely not the worst. You're the heartbeat of the crew — consistent, always there, and always just one round away from glory.
You are not alone. Seek out your fellow Middle-of-the-Packers and hunt down the Top of the Crop — the so-called swing kings who think they've already won it.
In a 2-vs-2 BetterBall Matchplay, you've always got a shot at causing an upset. Play smart, keep your cool, and let teamwork do the talking.
Feeling bold? Challenge the best to a 3-vs-1 — stroke their ego, make them think it's easy points, then use the power of three to hand the king a fourth-place finish.
Just be careful who you team up with — ending up with The Struggler in a 2-vs-2 could be hazardous to your leaderboard health. And when you do land on the losing team, there's still hope — beat the second guy on the winning team, and you'll earn yourself a tidy bonus point. Because even in defeat, the grinders find a way.
a.k.a. The Glue, The Vibe Captain
"May not win the round, but always wins the night."
You might not break 80, but you break open the beers and keep the crew alive. Without you, the group chat dies and nobody knows when the next game is.
Your path to victory? Chaos. Set up matches that mess with the leaderboard. Convince the top players to go head-to-head while you quietly sneak into second for solid points.
Remember, presence is power — every game you play means another shot at points. And when you can't win on the course, you win the after-party.
Your trophy? Laughter, stories, and a hangover worth bragging about. 🍻
Download ThatsGolfBoys and start proving — or disproving — your crew identity on the course.